Track 3 - Philadelphia Freedom - Elton John "The Reason for the Glitter"
"I used to be a heart beating for someone - how the times have changed...”
I hit the road with my sister, In search of some much needed Philadelphia Freedom, the kind Elton belted in that 1974 banger. That's how we rolled, filling her car with a call and response to this song, on repeat, as it's message and ideals were the backbone to that trip.
An attempt to figure it all out. Broad statement as that is we both were plagued with our own issues and in need of being pacified. I wanted the answers for all the bad mojo fermentin’ in my gut, and her, she was trying to see an inch ahead, the muddy path she found herself on. Together we were a couple of lost souls, using the road, a single map, and a killer playlist to guide our way.
To fully understand this part of the story we have to take a trip down memory lane with 2 different detours in two different decades.
So, Buckle up!
“If you choose to you can live your life alone, some people choose the city some others choose the good ol family home”
About a year and a half earlier my sister asked me to go to Chicago with her for a weekend.
“Of Course!’
Was my response without even a moment to question it.
I would do anything for her! She's my day 1.
During the days leading up to the trip, the time that most people would be packing and preparing themselves, I found myself obsessively crafting... the perfect playlist. Hours and hours were spent thinking back to all the songs we used to love; embarrassing diddy's as evenly picked as sensible tunes... It had been a long time since I had seen her and this playlist, it had to reflect just how much I was missing her, and subconsciously, the person I used to be.
So, when my sister picked me up, I got the pure delight of surprising her with the massive 20 hour long list, all bangers, catered to be a sing along fest from start to finish. Memories straight from our childhood. From the moment I entered the car until I left it the Monday night after the trip had ended, we listened to that beast and we sung our hearts out till there was nothing left in us.
Something happened in that process, a processing; an awakening. It was as if I had found part of myself and I didn’t know was missing. I'm sure lots of people get a similar feeling when surrounding themselves with their family that they haven’t seen in a while, a warm familiar love, classic nostalgia bringing you back to 'the good ol days'... but... this was more than that, this was different. I poured out a lot of my shit in those songs we sang... and I felt myself, during the 8 hours on the road get younger, my heart lighter and my soul brighter!
“Oh Philadelphia freedom, shine on me”
I whole heartedly, felt like that kid that used to sit in the back of Dad’s big fun party van on those massive summer road trips we use to go on, camping across Canada. We would drive for days on end, no destination, just road, tree's and summer breezes... well, that and a curated cassette tape playlist made by Dad (incase you were wondering where I get it from). We would all split cosco boxes of full chocolate bars with our problems, all of which were in conjunction to Mr. Marsh's math homework, a whole summer away! The only discomfort we felt; the cemented sand under our fingers and the strip of sun burn on our noses the bottle of SPF30 never seemed to protect.
For the most part...
For the realest part...
Carefree!
“Cause I live and breathe this Philadelphia freedom From the day that I was born I've waved the flag”
I felt like it was my 11-year-old hands that were digging deep in our roadside candy haven snacks, not my 25-year-old ones. The songs we sang, there was no pretention, there was no cool vibe, this was the cheesiest of the cheese songs... and in those moments I actually remembered what music used to mean to me. I realized how much more earnest that attachment was, specially comparing it to the one I had shrouded myself in as a 'city girl' in Toronto. The sugar traveled straight through my blood and to my brain and my eyes lit up with fire and glitter.
“Shine the light through the eyes of the one’s left behind”
When I got back from that trip to Chicago, not the one from my last story, rather, this one with my sister... I promised myself I wouldn’t lose it again, I wouldn’t lose that sparkle in my eye. But life has a tendency to suck that sunshine from your core. So, when I found myself holding on for deal life to that one sparkly thread tied to that part of my youth I knew it was time to get back to the road.
“If a cause was right I’d leave to find the answer on the road”.
So we went to Philadelphia, my heavy heart was exhausted from constantly battling that over crowded head of mine and I wanted, wished and willed for the answers to so many questions, for that burn in my gut to be subdued. I roared those Elton John lyrics from the depths of that aching gut and nothing came up. It was the equivalent of dry heaving...
All Trip Long!
I vividly remember finding myself in this mosaic house, The Magical Gardens, glass and mirror projecting the reflection of my face as I reflected on some dark dissatisfactions. Dissatisfaction with my own ability to make any decisions or make any actions in regards to my own happiness. I felt all smashed up, just like those fragments n' mosaics.
That was all I thought I was going to get out of that trip, some tears shed in a room made of beautifully coloured glass.
“Till the whippoorwill of freedom zapped me right between the eyes”
Just when I thought the trip was over, pointless, as we were en route back to the city, that little sprite like version of myself appeared in from a cloud of gold dust, sprinkling that same powdered sugar and bubble gum happiness on my cloud.
The sugar overload of happiness I once knew so well.
It provided no answers, but , what I did learn through the glitter, the bright lights, the distractions and the much over due candy and music binge with my sister, sometimes things just don't make sense. Questions don’t have to be answered. The important thing... is don't lose yourself, no matter how embarrassing that self can be. Be the full cheese. I know it doesn’t sound like much, but when you hear these words spoken to you from your own younger self, something in it’s honesty makes sense. It made my blood cool from its boil and I felt, once again, like that old version of myself.
For the most part...
For the realest part...
Carefree
“Shine the light, won’t you shine the light”
So, adding that little zest of glitter to each case, is my way of extending that sparkly thread that I keep tight to my side, connected to my inner child. It’s an important side of music that I think we often look past but when it grabs us, it gets us and stops us dead in our tracks. The glitter is for those moments.
“Philidelphia Freedom, I love-ve-ve you, yes I do”
These road trips with my sister lead to an awakening in me about the problems I was having not just with my relationship but also, my relationship to music.
To understand how I opened up to other people , their stories and fave tunes, you gotta listen to Track 4. After all, I state again, this is just as much about me as it is about you too.